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Refer to page 32, “Toe the Line” by Dr Carmen Clegg and Mr Baldwin’s cartoon
Use the following topic sentences and the plan to construct an essay.
Introduction: The insidious nature of junk food and the industry’s advertising tactics have prompted widespread debate about who should take responsibility for the health debacle and who should pay for the consequences. In her opinion piece entitled “Time to toe the line” (published in The Daily newspaper on the 5th August 2010), Dr Carren Clegg, a public relations consultant at FamilyFirstFoods, makes a passionate plea to the public, and consumers of junk food in particular, to hold the junk food industry to account. Similarly, the cartoon by Mr Baldwin that accompanies the opinion piece highlights the disastrous effects of junk food on a teenager’s sense of wellbeing.
(Paragraph 1, p. 32)
What to include:
- the comparison between junk food industry and cigarettes and
- the attack on junk food companies (colloquial language)
- purpose of the attack and tone.
Topic sentence: Dr Clegg advocates for a sugar tax on the grounds that members of the public are suffering from obesity-related diseases. Accordingly, she uses an analogy throughout her article to compare the shameful tactics of the junk food and cigarette industries.
(Evidence/ examples) The author’s introductory analogy between Uncle Jed’s Roll-Up and “low tar cigarettes” is designed to unsettle all consumers who are unaware of the undesirable ingredients in these food snacks. In an adamant tone, she states that “whether the cigarette is low or high in tar, it can still be fatal”. By association then she suggests that junk food is just as detrimental to our health even if it has less sugar and less fat — a claim that is bound to make consumers doubly anxious about their health. Dr Clegg reinforces her attack on the junk food companies with colloquial words such as “gimmick” and “hoodwinking”. These words carry negative connotations and suggest that the junk food industry is corrupting people’s diets. This sharp criticism is bound to antagonise many consumers who would be angry at the fact that they may have been deceived.
Paragraph 2, p. 33
What to include:
- Examples and statistics and their purpose
- Use of clichés and their purpose
Topic sentence: To advance her argument and to highlight the severity of the health risk, Dr Clegg opines that even young children are becoming dangerously obese.
(Evidence/ examples) While the example of a 10-year-old child who weighs 88 kilos is likely to shock and disgust readers, the emotive and perhaps hyperbolic example of two-year-old victims will certainly elicit sympathy. Such examples also prepare readers for appropriate solutions. The use of the cliché that “Victoria is in the same boat” (as Great Britain) makes us realise that we have no reason to be complacent when it comes to the obesity stakes. According to this writer, the problem is being, idiomatically-speaking, “swept under the carpet”. Concerned parents are bound to feel indignant at the tactics; however, many will also feel irresponsible and guilty if they have been buying such “lazy-playlunch-snack foods”.
(Paragraph 3, p. 32)
- Appeals to public health and responsibility (tone)
- Appeal to hip pocket and common sense
- Purpose and impact
Topic sentence: Additionally, the author promotes government action because of the lack of accountability displayed by corporate businesses. This is because there is a conflict of interest between public health and the vested interests of these companies.
(Evidence/ examples) Appealing to issues such as duty of care, Dr Clegg seeks to incense consumers because of the suggestion that the government is not holding these companies to account. The author’s cause-and-effect reasoning — that diseases arising from a poor diet will create an extra burden on our public health system – further appeal to hip-pocket nerve concerns of taxpayers. By using an adamant tone and classic fearmongering tactics, she effectively persuades parents and policy makers that “there will be a terrible price to pay”. Dr Clegg expects that consumers will pressure the government to regulate the industry and treat the problem with the urgency it deserves.
(Paragraph 4, p. 32)
Similarly, the cartoonist depicts a doctor who alerts his patient to the fact that he is ill because he has high blood pressure. The cartoonist quotes the doctor who compares the blood pressure of this elderly and seriously overweight patient to that of a teenager’s. The implication is that teenagers are unhealthy and endangering their lives. The doctor’s dialogue sarcastically refers to teenagers who passively watch television and computers while eating junk food. This comment reinforces Dr Clegg’s view that the health system and taxpayers will suffer a potential crisis in public health.
(Conclusion) Both Dr Clegg and the cartoonist draw attention to the rising incidence of childhood obesity. Dr Clegg reproaches the junk food industry, who, she believes, is using deceitful tactics. She uses numerous techniques such as colloquial and negative language, comparisons with the cigarette industry and idiomatic expressions to draw attention to the worrying trend. She punctuates her attack with some dramatic examples of children who are seriously overweight, so that consumers will become alarmed at the type of food they may be buying. Drawing upon the precedence set by cigarette companies, the author makes the public realize that everyone will be affected by the adverse consequences of obesity. This concern is also the subject of Mr Baldwin’s cartoon, which humorously compares an overweight elderly person’s health with that of a teenager’s. As such, the cartoonist draws attention to the strain on the public health system should the government and consumers fail to take responsibility.
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- Go to Lesson 5: the author’s attack
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