Sample Essay based on Sandra’s experiences in South Africa (Dr Jennifer Minter, English Works)
WE LEARN A GREAT DEAL ABOUT THE STRUGGLE TO BE ONESELF FROM SANDRA’S LIFE AND THE CHALLENGES SHE AND HER FAMILY FACED.
As Jane Austen said, “we have all a better guide in ourselves, if we would attend to it, than any other person can be.” However, this is not as easy as it seems. Sometimes, attending to our “better guide” takes an enormous amount of courage. Such a struggle to be ourselves, forces us to make very difficult choices and accept the consequences which often may be extremely devastating for one’s sense of security.
Following our “better guides” for some is not problematic, especially if we have a supportive environment and ideal opportunities.
However, if we are living in repressive regimes and feel an acute sense of difference then the struggle to be oneself can lead to enormous sacrifice and come at a huge personal cost.
Contrary to what the French 18th century philosopher Montaigne once said, “a wise man never loses anything if he have himself”, Sandra Laing’s story as depicted in the film Skin proves that there is indeed a lot to lose.
Can you imagine the prejudice that a person like Sandra is forced to confront as she struggles to maintain her integrity in a system that despises coloured people? For Sandra Laing, the end of South Africa’s apartheid policy in 1994 comes all too late.
Because of her skin colour she is rejected by the white society in South Africa which believes that her darker skin is contaminating their white environment. Her fight for survival shows that in keeping our own counsel and in trying to be true to ourselves, we often have to make choices and these determine the type of person we will become. We learn that if we are constantly excluded and belittled in a community, this can have devastating consequences for an individual. It can scar a personal for life.
For Sandra, the scorn and humiliation that she suffers are so severe and so personally devastating that she would risk everything to escape it. In the white community, Sandra constantly feels humiliated and belittled. Although she automatically accepted herself as a “white person” before she went to school, she soon becomes the butt of racist innuendos and constant stares. She is made to feel different and constantly isolated and excluded. Whether it be at school, or at a restaurant with her white boyfriend, or …. someone is always staring at her and complaining about her presence.
How would you feel?
Just imagine. The teachers are deliberately persecuting you and actively seeking to have you expelled because they believe that your hair is too frizzy? Or your skull is too broad? And the canings get harder and harder because you are shamefully black.
Sexually, she feels degraded and demeaned by her white suitors. Many express bigoted white attitudes and do not accept her as a person. Johan states “you don’t have to feel bad about looking like a coloured. It’s okay with me” as if to excuse the discomfort arising from her colour differences.
Likewise, although he loves her, her father also reflects the bigoted attitude towards Sandra and these principles are so ingrained that he opts to reject his daughter because of her choice to remain with Petrus. He takes it as a personal affront that she has betrayed him by choosing a life with Petrus, unable to understand that she is completely uncomfortable in white company.
How can she remain true to herself in such a devastatingly destructive environment?
What is Sandra’s answer? Courage. Bucket loads of courage. She risks everything for the sake of freedom and emotional stability. She risks her family, status, security and her future.
The coloured community offers her the chance for emotional and psychological stability. “They are more friendly”. However, such “friendliness” leaves her exposed. She must reduce herself to live in poverty and is constantly hunted by the authorities. She is forever on the move, without money or security.
In keeping her own counsel and being her own “better guide” she has to escape from her family who disown her. Her biggest regret is that she never had the chance to explain and justify her choices to her father. He just slammed the door shut.
We must always show courage to be ourselves and to withstand the dark forces that threaten to overwhelm us and that threaten to destroy our peace of mind and emotional fulfilment.
There are many stories where people have had to struggle to gain acceptance in communities or to assert their own individuality. As Zorba the Greek wisely said, “a man needs a little madness, or else he never dares cut the rope and be free.” Likewise, Age cartoonist and writer Michael Leunig, says “if we don’t make for ourselves some small hand-crafted peculiarity it will certainly be provided by fate in due course.”…. However, sometimes that madness sets people apart and creates difficulties as they try to find their own authentic self.
However, often holding onto this “hand-crafted peculiarity” and following our true path can be fraught with danger. Holden Caulfield in J.D. Salinger’s Catcher in the Rye rails against the phoniness and pretentiousness of his school environment. “One of the biggest reasons I left Elkton Hills was because I was surrounded by phonies.” And of the headmaster, Mr Haas, he claims he was the “phoniest bastard” he had ever met in his life. Holden criticises the materialistic view of life of his school peers. At school “all you do is study so that you can learn enough to be smart enough to be able to buy a goddam Cadillac some day…” and he tries to separate himself from the hypocrisy. Unfortunately though Holden is forever vulnerable and likely to fall through the cracks. He knows what he doesn’t want to be. But he can’t find a positive alternative. He is heading for a “horrible fall” and unable to stop himself as he retreats further into an idyllic childhood world where innocence and spontaneity are cherished but unrealistic commodities.
But the most important thing is that he does not stop trying. His failure perhaps reinforces the magnitude of Sandra’s fight for justice and for integrity in a world that is so completely hostile. Armed with love and plenty of good will, she finally makes it through, but not before she loses her husband, suffers the indignity of abuse and almost loses her children. After several marriages later, she finds the comfort and support she deserves and surrounds herself with a brood of love.
Her story proves as Confucius notes, “no matter where you go, there you are”.
Return to Skin Deep and Sandra Laing