Jim asks: I am often marked down in English because my teacher says that my expression is often unclear or clumsy. I thought ideas were the thing that mattered.
Jim, there is a link between good expression and good ideas/clear thought processes.
If you are consistently losing marks in English, it is often because you have awkward phrases/expression. If the entire essay consists of clumsy, clunky grammar, it is hard to achieve an A.
Tim’s paragraph:
By referring to her personal experience, the author criticises Kyle Sandiland’s comment and emphasis the affect of bullying (1). She highlights that it is “much worse than the problems associated with her disability”. (2) The author expects reader to feel frustrated towards Kyle Sandiland, because he is acting as irresponsible role model (3). Furthermore, using her personal experience (4), it increases the public’s awareness towards the issue of bullying, because it has a such terrifying affects on individual.
- The subject of the verb “emphasis” is “the author”: it should be in the singular/present tense/ “emphasises”. Note the conjunction “and” joins together two predicates/verbs: “criticises” and “emphasises”.
- The verb “highlights” is a transitive verb, which means that it needs a grammatical object, ie. “She highlights the point that it is ….”
- You are referring to a specific role model so you must include the indefinite article, “an”.
- Be careful with non-finite or “ing” verbs; they do not have a direct grammatical subject and this can lead to grammatical errors. In this case, the grammatical subject “it” does not directly relate to “using her personal experience”.
Be precise: some points to keep in mind:
- Underline the pronouns: do they clearly relate to a preceding noun?
- Underline the verbs: if they are non-finite verbs (‘ing) do they have a clear subject in the following or preceding clause.
- Underline the verbs: is the tense consistent?
- Underline “and”: if there are two or more items/ objects/ things connected are they the same part of speech? Ie nouns/ adjectives/ verbal phrases?
- Underline singular and plural nouns: do they clearly relate to singular/plural verbs?
- Underline a lengthy clause: is it better to use a noun phrase (see nominalisation)
- Long sentences: underline the clauses – is there a clear independent clause?
Return to Grammar Page
See other tasks to help you improve
Return to : what to bring to every lesson